In the movie “Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps,” Michael Douglas’ Gordon Gekko drops an incredible line, parabolizing about being able to spot another Wall Street guy. The line is “a fisherman can always see another fisherman from afar.” Replace fisherman with any profession you’ve ever worked and it holds true. I worked retail for quite a while, and I can spot someone else who has worked retail, …mostly from the will to live being absent from their eyes.
Over the last three years, I’ve done a lot of introspection, trying to find out about myself. I’d spent twenty years having the identity of someone’s boyfriend, fiancee, and husband. Once that was gone, what identity was left? That inner-reflection has benefited me in spades; I know who I am, as a person, as a professional, and as a creative. When you take responsibility for someone else’s existence out of the equation, it is much easier to analyze the aspects of yourself, and have a much better idea of who you are. That information will tell you multitudes about how to get where you are going.
A friend of mine told me they were told by a medium to write a book—which is a fascinating plot in and of itself—but it made sense. As a storyteller, I can see the storyteller in that person. While reflecting on my young life, I saw the storyteller in my young self, and I was very proud.
I have lofty ambitions for myself. I want to be the greatest storyteller of all time. At the current moment, I am not the greatest storyteller of all time. I know where I want to go, I am prepared to do the work to get there, and I am prepared to dedicate my entire lifetime getting there. If I do not become the greatest storyteller of all time, it will not be a life wasted. I love the process, I enjoy telling stories, and I feel so fulfilled as an individual learning the process. What makes the A.P. Miller story even more compelling is that I taught myself how to do these things. I wish I would have had the foresight to get myself enrolled in creative writing, but would my story have been as interesting? I taught myself to write novels, format screenplays, write comic book scripts, and there is no limit to the other things I can do. I am not bragging, but perhaps acknowledging that I have the innate ability to just …do things.
It would be unfair, and insulting, to the other brilliant authors that occupy this world with me to make it seem like I just woke up one morning and decided I was going to write books. Like them, I’ve always had aptitudes for storytelling, I just didn’t always have a pencil in my hand. I loved playing with action figures when I was younger, for example. I wasn’t playing with my Superman figures, reenacting the pages of a comic book, I was taking the Man of Steel on his own adventures. I did end up with a pencil in my hand, I had ambitions of being a comic book artist, and I would create characters who looked cool. I filled notebooks and sketchbooks with these drawings and sketches. I should have gone to school for creative writing, but with my learning disorder, doodling & drawing was seen as fucking off, and not paying attention.
In the off-chance a scientist reads “A Law of Constants,” and is inspired to develop time travel, and a young A.P. Miller comes across this blog, please know this: you couldn’t see it when you were young, but as an adult, you recognize that you weren’t wasting time. You, being you, were sharp
ening the skills of doing what you do best.
Thank you for joining me on this trip across the Millerverse!
—
Songs Listened to While Writing This Blog:
- “Night” – Bruce Springsteen
- “Hush” – Deep Purple
- “Wherever You Go” – Sublime (With Rome)
- “Come Original” – 311
- “Circle in the Sand” – Belinda Carlisle
A.P. Miller 