Author & Novelist
June 12, 2020
[NAME OF COMMUNITY & MANAGEMENT COMPANY REDACTED TO SAVE THEM FROM THEIR OWN EMBARRASSMENT]
Re: My Apartment
Dear, Community Manager:
I don’t even know where to begin with you people, I lay awake at night wondering how you people get any sleep yourselves. I have NEVER dealt with a management company like you folks, and I’ve held my silence for WAY too long! My voice WILL be heard! You will no longer silence the masses!
Continue reading “Dear Apartment Community.”
[DISCLAIMER]: This blog post might not be the most interesting to read, unless you have aspirations to be a writer (then AWESOME! Let me know if I can be helpful in any way), are a small business owner, or are really into business concepts. I apologize for it being so loooooooong, I am just really passionate about the idea. We will return to our regularly scheduled mayhem and chicanery next week!
As an independent and self-published author, I have found that there is a lot of benefit in being active in the writing communities across social media platforms. It may seem like an innocuous congregation of creative people communicating with kindred spirits, but it’s also a crucial business concept otherwise known as “networking.” Writers come together to discuss matters of style, mechanics of grammar, storytelling approaches, and how to get people to know about your work. Apply that description to a business application: people are coming together to talk about materializing an idea, the process of assembling the product, and marketing the product. Two seemingly different worlds, but identical concepts.
Continue reading “Garage Band Marketing For Independent Writers”
[DISCLAIMER]: The following text was translated from a transmission obtained during a solar emission. The grammar was repaired in translation, but some terms may have been confused. If you take issue with anything that was said in the following document, please assume that it is a translation error and couldn’t possibly be pointed at you.
[MEMORANDUM]
TO: Emperor Gflurgganx, the most supreme leader of the Bixxad Empire
FROM: Flirggol, General of the Earth Invasion Forces
DATE: 9th of Vrolloj, in the year of Gflurgganx
RE: Invasion of Earth
Continue reading “Memorandum: Call Off the Attack, The Earthlings Are Doing the Work For Us!”
Let it be known: I love Jean Claude Van Damme movies and I don’t give a rats ass who knows it! I have seen everything from “No Retreat, No Surrender” to Direct to DVD Universal Soldier sequels, and they are all amazing. In fact, I have seen so many Jean Claude Van Damme movies, that I have identified a pattern, a formula for action movie greatness that took Jean Claude Van Damme from being a skinny kid from Belgium to the Greatest Action Movie Star Ever!*
*I’m not going to get into an argument with you. Chuck Norris is okay, Bruce Lee was alright, and Steven Seagal was a flash in the pan.
Continue reading “The Van Damme Code”
[DISCLAIMER]: This blog is intended for entertainment purposes only and not meant to defame or discredit anyone. Any similarities between anyone specific is purely coincidental. If you take issue with the way anyone is portrayed, perhaps take a long look at how you treat other human beings and stop being an asshole. Thank you.
I’m going to share a deep, dark secret about people in the retail industry: a lot of people who leave them are super entitled with mismanaged expectations and so the rest of them aren’t taken very seriously by anyone who actually works with the public at your favorite store. In fact, some of them wouldn’t mind reviewing you, the customer.
Continue reading “Reversing the Reviews”
A.P. Miller 